Thursday, November 30, 2017

Day 218 Of 365 Days of Cock

Not So Great Moments In Penis History! During Andrei Chikatio's (Butcher of Rastov) court hearing he fought with the judge then turned to the court room crowd & exposed his cock while screaming, "what could I do with this useless thing?" ...he later claimed to be pregnant! 

Wednesday, November 29, 2017

Day 217 Of 365 Days of Cock

According to Chuck Negron (Three Dog Night) he fucked so much back in the day that his cock exploded, & by exploded he didn't mean cummin' buckets! 

Tuesday, November 28, 2017

!!BONUS COCK!!

Watching Senator Tim Scott on CNN's debate night, I can't help but think he's a fucking dick!

 I drew this earlier in the night while watching the Tax debate on CNN, Ted Cruz, Bernie Sanders, & Maria Cantwell all gave answers ranging from great to not so great but there was something about Tim Scott that annoyed me the most, he just came across as a fucking dick... we all know where we stand on this so I won't bore you with my stance that I probably wouldn't articulate well anyway, especially since my tendinitis is killing me and sitting in this chair is painful as fuck!  

Day 216 Of 365 Days of Cock


 I am not a fan of ole Saint Dick or Christmas, but I thought since Christmas is coming I'd get into the spirit...

here is one of my favorite Christmas tunes!

Monday, November 27, 2017

Day 215 Of 365 Days of Cock

In response to Morrissey's question, "Yes, I do have a vacancy for a back scrubber!"

Karl Bakla sez, "Scrub me 360"

Bill O'Reilly sez, "I want to scrub your fat body with a falafel you disgusting drunk!" 

I don't know why but I find the lyrics, "do you have a vacancy for a back scrubber" hilarious, I don't even know what it means, but images of a soapy hard cock  gliding up another dudes butt crack comes to mind, I don't mean this as a bad thing, I have showered with others and soaped up their bodies and got an erection... that was long time ago, no one wants to shower with me now because I am old, fat, and gross also I drink so much alcohol I can no longer get hard, which means this drawing is a lie... 

If you need more shitty Bakla art I posted a Hanky Code drawing @ P.A.G.A.N.

Saturday, November 25, 2017

Day 213 Of 365 Days of Cock

This dick is on his way to the Great Basin National Park... time for another road trip, there is so many amazing things to see in Nevada time to check off a few more of them off of my list! 

Friday, November 24, 2017

Day 212 Of 365 Days of Cock

November 24th is National Buy Nothing Day... go on a hike, eat some leftovers, ride your bike, take a walk, & smoke some weed! Fuck Black Friday! Participate by not participating!

Thursday, November 23, 2017

Day 211 Of 365 Days of Cock

Fuck Thanksgiving! Fuck eating meat! Fuck your lame family and sure this is after the fact but fuck MTV! 

Also nothing screams Thanksgiving like all of the DAPL protests and the private security firms battling with peaceful protesters... 

Of course you can forget about MDC's great Thanksgiving tune...

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

Day 210 Of 365 Days of Cock


 Great for cannibals that want a cruelty free meal... even when I ate meat I disliked Thanksgiving meals, dry turkey, bland food, and spending time with people you are obligated to spend time with even though they don't really want to spend time with you, because they hate you and everything you stand for... no thanks! This Thanksgiving I am gonna do it in style and sleep through it.

 The only redeeming thing about Thanksgiving is pecan pie and the reemergence of the Tofurkey Holiday Roast, yum! 

Tuesday, November 21, 2017

Day 209 Of 365 Days of Cock


 November is Tie One On For Safety Month, so whether you refrain from drunk driving, put on a condom prior to fucking, or if you wear a seat belt.. do it safe, so you can do it again!  With that said, lets put the danger back into to Rock 'n' Roll!  

Monday, November 20, 2017

Day 208 Of 365 Days of Cock


The rumors are true, 365 Days of Cock is Satanic and believes in a war against Christmas, lets break it down 3 6's = 666, 5 days after the apocalypse it is believed that the cock of Satan will emerge from hell breaking a pathway for fans of extreme metal, Pokemon, Harry Potter, & touch dancing!  
 It is true Procter & Gamble is in bed with the devil! Well, maybe not so true, but religious fucks used to believe it and for me that is a selling point! Here is my revamped version of their original logo!

 I was listening to The Thinking Atheist Podcast and really enjoyed the recent episode about the Satanic Panic, this is where I heard about the Procter and Gamble satanic logo thing...



While we are on the subject of Satan here is a Dwarves song that dabbles on the topic



 Remember true evil never dies, it multiplies! ...for the record I don't believe in evil and like most people who say they do, I talk about it in a forked tongue in cheek kind of way, it's a fun, "fuck you" to people that use their religion as an excuse to be a intolerant dick! 

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Day 206 Of 365 Days of Cock


 I don't have an excuse why I don't skateboard very often, besides I am fat and old... it's not like I am lazy I ride my bike all the time, but whatever the reason even though I don't ride besides the occasional drunken adventure, skateboarding still is very important and influential to me... Skateboarding was fun, but skateboarding was the whole package... the shitty sense of humors of skateboarders, the aggressive music, the awesome art, & Thrasher Magazine... anyway this is an advertisement for my  pro model, it's kind of like the Hosoi Hammer Head deck, but minus the Christian bullshit and instead of a Hammerhead it's a dick head...

 On a side note, it cracks me up when people that have a knack for making bad decisions, decided to take guidance from a book of fiction... getting clean, staying out of jail, not being dead is great and if you need guidance from a higher power then I guess that's more important than the alternative, as for me I always believed that,  "Skatin' and Satan goes Hand In Hoof"*

*to quote the band Spazz

Friday, November 17, 2017

Day 205 Of 365 Days of Cock


Recently when I was drunk and taking a shit, I started to read One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest & I couldn't help but think, "One Flew Over A Cuckold Nest", then I giggled which helped jiggle a turd out of my body

Thursday, November 16, 2017

Day 204 Of 365 Days of Cock


 I wasn't too stoked about #200's dick art so I thought a redo was in-store...

 Well I have to tell you I am pretty stoked that Tonight I am gonna catch Propagandhi and RVIVR, maybe I am wrong but they are two of the most listenable political punk bands around, as for listenable punk bands they are also on top! Usually I will support bands that politically are on point  but suck shit musically, so I am super stoked to be able to do a cartwheel for 2 politically on point bands that sound awesome! Sure I am a bit drunk, but I don't care if I disagree with someone's politics, but when you listen to a pop punk band and know that they support the police and don't think Black Lives Matters, you get bummed! As one of punk rock's most elite I have to tell you, you don't have to hate cops personally, but publicly you have to hate what cops represent, if not you are a poser and a fucking dad!

Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Day 203 Of 365 Days of Cock

Concern #5,666,027 about Trump being the President of the United States of America: Being asked* by aliens, "take us to your leader!" ...what do you do in that situation, are they gonna judge us on weather we are worthy to live based on our leader? Will they enslave us and butt rape us? I don't know, I just hope we are never put in that situation, but if I am I will call in to Coast To Coast AM to talk about it. 

*I guess this is more a demand than a question, oh well! 

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Day 202 Of 365 Days of Cock


A great penis related track is Detachable Penis by King Missile, but you probably already know that...



...another great track by King Missile is Take Stuff From Work.!



...that's all for now, I have to boogie!

Monday, November 13, 2017

Day 201 Of 365 Days of Cock

Sure James Earl Jones character (Thulsa Doom) in Conan the Barbarian was a total dick head, but he sure had nice hair!

 I just found a band by the name Thulsa Doom, check 'em out!

Saturday, November 11, 2017

Day 199 Of 365 Days of Cock

 I find it exhausting when people are continuously negative... I work with people like this and I often wonder who fucks them*? I don't support being apathetic, but isn't easier to focus on shit that is fun like going for a hike or whatever it is you love to do. Some times I feel like I am surrounded by people that are afraid to leave their houses** because they think they will get robbed or hurt, they constantly tell me shit like they are afraid to die, but in doing so they are afraid to live. They usually tell me shit like riding a bike will get me killed... I constantly stumble around the "ghetto" with a pocket full of tips and not once have I been robbed, as a fat sweaty old guy, I am a big easy target, if anyone is gonna get robbed it's me. I walk on the edge of mountains and enjoy the view and not once have I fallen to my death. I guess it's easier to sit at home and think of an excuse why you shouldn't leave... I know that any day I could drop dead, Donald Trump could start a nuclear war, or I could die from drinking the water because corporations would rather cut corners to save a few bucks than ensure lives.

 This has been a rough year for my family but it feels like we might be in the clear for the mean time, it was really nice to have the things and people in my life that I love to get through the bullshit. I just thought I should state that I love my family, and "yes!" I do think that a 365 Penis Project is the most appropriate place for that.

* I often wonder about the people that have fucked me, I am kind of gross. I assume if I was set up on a blind date the person would describe me as being "funny", having a "nice personality", & "punctual".

**for the record I think it's cool if you never leave your house if you think it's cool, if you invited me over for some beers and a dip in your pool I'd join you (especially in the summer). I just hate the weird world view that is projected on others by people that never leave the suburbs, that was my point, sorry if I insulted you. 

Friday, November 10, 2017

Day 198 Of 365 Days of Cock

 Art is cathartic! These recent mass shootings have been very upsetting. I needed to free myself of it so I thought about making a funny drawing with a message like, "shoot cock not people" or "shoot your cocks load instead of load, cock, and fire!"

Then I remembered all of the allegations of sexual assault in the news & I didn't think I should encourage men to jizz since some dudes are too sick or fucked up to realize it's a joke, if that describes you how about "shoot your cock not your load!" 

Thursday, November 9, 2017

Day 197 Of 365 Days of Cock


 It always cracks me up when the racist person doesn't like being called a racist... I remember in the 80's and early 90's you would have some peckerhead from the Church of the Creator or National Alliance on a talk show and when asked, "why do you hate?" they would usually have some dumb answer like, "I don't hate I just love my race so much" ...barf! As a Sri Lankan guy I spend little to no time thinking about my race, Sure I love to eat curry and when I ate meat I loved crab curry, but my ethnicity is just what it is, it doesn't make me any better than anyone else... Your white polo shirt makes you look like a "dad" and I mean that as an insult, and your racist outlook makes you act like a fucking grampa and I mean that as an insult. Fuck white power, fuck college dickheads that think Ronald Reagan is the new Jesus, & fuck anyone under the age of 40 that would sport a "Make America Great Again" hat, I am drunk and this is starting to bore me... 

Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Day 196 Of 365 Days of Cock

 It's called a ding dong because you tap it like a door bell... did I share with you that I tried to trade booze and sleeping pills in for marijuana? Shit did not go well... I have heard from lots of people that marijuana is great for insomnia. I also heard that my lack of sleep, alcohol, and sleeping pill abuse would end my life... as someone that doesn't sleep this perked my interest, so I went to the weed store. I told the guy at the weed store my issue, he referred to pot as, "flower" and suggested I buy 2 super joints, I bought 4. He told me not to take more than 5 puffs.... fast-forward to home and I am sitting in my backyard sparking up a joint with my main squeeze Bethany. I try 5 puffs and it doesn't mean shit to me, so I smoke the thing down to the end, Bethany takes a few to help kill it. The joint is done and I feel nothing at first, then I feel pretty groovy, I actually feel comfortable in my skin, the first time in ages... so I go upstairs and lie in bed. My bed feels so soft, the pillows feel so big they swallow me whole. I lay in bed thinking, "for the first time in my life I will sleep good!" I was so wrong, as I lied in bed with my eyes closed the patterns in my head grew intense, the colors even more intense... it was like a wave of colors and patterns washed over me... as someone that dislikes fiction I found it interesting for about 45 minutes then I grew bored of it, very bored of it! For about three hours I was treated to a pattern that seemed to get more intense and more colorful as time went by, as for me I wasn't impressed I wanted my mind to rest, & I wanted to sleep! Not trip balls! Luckily, sometime near the late afternoon shit cleared up and I was able to go to First Friday... I walked around FxFx stoked to be with my family but bummed, I thought marijuana would solve my insomnia problems, I guess not... 

Tuesday, November 7, 2017

Day 195 Of 365 Days of Cock

In a recent interview in Razorcake the band Crom proclaims, "a finger in the ass is better than two in the eyes!" from personal experience I agree! I once had a friend do this and I could feel their French tips scraping my insides... 

I hate to admit it, I knew of the band Crom but never seriously checked them out till this recent Razorcake interview, I dug what I heard, if I have any tip money left over after paying the bills I will order a Crom record and do some deeper listening! By deeper I mean deeper than this finger up this asshole! Death to false metal!

Crom "All Hail Those who Fail" Trailer 2 from Patrick Kennedy on Vimeo.

Monday, November 6, 2017

Day 194 Of 365 Days of Cock

These arms were meant for hugging, not war!

 I thought I would post a link to the Donna Brazilian Wax story since no one seems to give a fuck... I was impressed how silent the media was about it, as for Democrats they seemed to be quiet or dismiss it like it doesn't matter... look fellow "liberals", "progressives", "Bernarchists", and "Democrats", this tribalism and being on teams bullshit is what allows these fuckers to pull one (or several of them) over us. It's OK to be wrong, I know it sucks to admit it, but if we can't admit to ourselves that the DNC and politicians like the Clintons don't give two fucks about bettering our country / planet for the majority of us, how dare we point the finger at Republicans for having their heads straight up their ass? I can admit I voted for Obama, I can say he is was a disappointment, & I can still say, "fuck Trump!" and all the bullshit that comes with his administration.

 I am not very good at expressing my political beliefs in his fashion, I prefer to donate money, go to a protest, support ethical companies (boycott others), be a vegetarian, & even going out to the desert and picking up trash. So it sucks to have to write shit like this, but seeing the people that suppose to "care"and be "informed" choose denial & misinformation over the truth is frightening... I am just a dumb drunk that draws cocks & I can see through the alcoholic haze, so what's the issue? Get with it or continue to look like a corporate Democrat ass-licker like Bill Maher, oh well! I have to go to work! 

 I love drawing Austin, he is a three legged West Highland Terrier mix. I don't know why no one adopted him before us because he is one of the most loving dogs I have ever met & everyone he meets quickly falls in love with him. We lucked out with him & hopefully he thinks he lucked out with us... anyway enough of the love bullshit, whenever I have the urge to draw but can't think of anything I usually resort to drawing Austin. I don't know why this is important but I guess if we are doing a 365 art project I should share some of my drawing thought process...

Sunday, November 5, 2017

Day 193 Of 365 Days of Cock


 Today is one of those days where I didn't have a "brilliant" idea for cock art, but a 365 day project doesn't stop, so I won't and here is a guy that was hooked by his cock...  don't feel bad for him he was being an asshole & got himself caught... if I didn't mention the Guided By Voices gig I guess I should do so now, like expected it was excellent. Guided by Voices either played the entire recent album or pretty close to it and on top of that they managed to fit in most of my favorite tracks. The crowd seemed super stoked & it was cool to meet other Guided By Voices fans from all over! Blah, blah, blah, the next show I will be hitting up is Propagandhi, RVIVR, & Bad Cop Bad Cop, I'll see you there! If not maybe I'll hit up the Descendents gig, but I am not too sure about that because after seeing Propagandhi @ the Hard Rock I might need a break from seeing bands in venues I hate, ha! Actual, Vinyl isn't a bad venue I just hate going to "punk" shows that are in casinos or on the strip! 

Saturday, November 4, 2017

Day 192 Of 365 Days of Cock

I know I have stated this before... I would never disrespect your stank ass by stuffing my cock in it without protection! So why did you send my Off With Their Heads LP with out the protection of a clear protective sleeve? 

 For the record the Off With Their Heads record Hospitals rules! I have loved this record for years, I don't know why I never had a copy on vinyl but I recently wronged that right, but in doing so another wrong was revealed which was a record with no clear protective sleeve, rat fucking bastards! 

Friday, November 3, 2017

Day 191 Of 365 Days of Cock


 I already had the idea to draw this one as a last, "fuck you" to Hillary Clinton, but then I drove home from work and opened my phone & saw all sorts of stories about Donna Brazile admitting that Hillary Clinton, and the D.N.C. rigged the primary! 

 I could write a bunch about this but it has already been stated by better people so I will leave it at, Fuck you Hillary Clinton & the DNC for handing the presidency to an asshole like Donald Trump!

 I know this is unrelated but the guy that owns Papa Johns can coat my asshole with garlic butter and suck it off! 

Thursday, November 2, 2017

Day 190 Of 365 Days of Cock


"Damn, I wish I looked up the Hale-Bopp Comets next appearance prior to cutting my junk off... I'm trying to catch a ride on a U.F.O. that is trailing it. Year 4380 is a long time away!"

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Day 189 Of 365 Days of Cock

 I swear this one isn't a cry for help... I started to draw this last week, then I stopped and drew some cocks doing something else, then I went on a hike, then I went to see Guided By Voices, then Halloween, then I had to work... I started drawing this the morning I found out one of my friends passed away, in the long tradition of my friends I was told she committed suicide, I don't know if this is true it doesn't even matter, what matters is she is gone and I will never again run into her when Bethany and I are out on the town hamming it up.... rewind an hour earlier and I am driving home from work concerned about another one of my friends, he is in to put it mildly a fucked up relationship. My friend is obsessed with a woman that seems to only keep him around as a safety net, now this wouldn't be alarming in it's self, a lot of people I know are in fucked up relationships, but some of the things he has shared with me is troubling. I am/was so worried about him, then I got home and heard about about my friend passing and it took my mind off of him... to clear my mind I hopped on my bike and listened to one of my favorite current events podcasts, it was more bad news. Any chance the "resistance*" has just seems fucked. As for Donald Trump any hope of him going down is by Donald Trump, not the Corporatist Democrats... the DNC has become that dream killer parent, that tells you that you are being naive if you think you can grow up being happy doing what you want to do instead of what you have to do, I get it I need a job to pay my bills, but I spend the rest of my time getting drunk and drawing cocks... the Democrats are now the "No We Can't Party", paid for state university and universal health care are laughed off. I hope you want more drone strikes & rolled eyes because that is all they are gonna give you!

 In the background of all of this our city is still recovering from the Root 91 massacre...

 The part 2 to this drawing is a, "fuck you!" to the people (mostly men) that think showing the appropriate amount of emotion for a valid thing, is "faggot shit" and for "pussies". To feel is human and if you don't you are inhuman. The truth is I suspect these people do feel, they just don't have the "**balls" to express it.

*resistance = D.N.C. jerk offs!

**get a fucking vasectomy you don't need any more kids. For the record my friend Wayne says you can't tell the difference in the flavor of vasectomy and non vasectomy cum, the more you know!