Sunday, December 31, 2017

Day 249 Of 365 Days of Cock

According to my buddy that works as a porter New Years Eve sucks because dicks that can't handle their booze barf all over the bathroom... so when celebrating have fun and be respectful. Happy New Year! 

 So tonight when you are fucked up on the Las Vegas strip, aim your mouth into a trash can, drink lots of water, and don't make the casino porters night any harder than it already is, these folks work hard to keep the casino clean for you, don't make their night any harder because sadly it's not like these folks get paid more to work more... blah, blah, blah, I have no doubt the intended people of this message won't read this and will be barfing all over the casino and I will be calling for a, "bio!"

Saturday, December 30, 2017

Day 248 Of 365 Days of Cock

damn, not much time for dick art, on the road yesterday and just about to get back on the road for some more hiking... I did spot an amazing !!Bonus Cock!! at Cathedral Canyon

!!Bonus Cock!!

Friday, December 29, 2017

Day 247 Of 365 Days of Cock

to put it mildly Shoko Asahara is a dick head! For those not in the know Shoko Asahara is the leader of Aum Shinriko, his cult carried out a sarin gas attack on the Tokyo subway, & when his daughter visited him in jail he jerked off in front of her, gross! 

Tuesday, December 26, 2017

Day 244 Of 365 Days of Cock

You're mean to me
why must you be mean to me
gee, honey, it seems to me
you love to see me cryin'

just realized I drew the circle over the singers body, oh well! I don't have enough time to correct it

Monday, December 25, 2017

Day 243 Of 365 Days of Cock

It's a 2 for one, Beat Your Meat Monday and Merry Christmas... I hope for all of you that get sucked into celebrating Christmas you find sometime to be alone and Jack or Jill off!

 I would thank Mr.Trump for bringing back Merry Christmas, even though it never went away... why do people want to scare children into thinking someone is trying to take Christmas away? I assume it's early indoctrination into our culture of fear... fuck it, lets listen to some Dark Funeral!

Sunday, December 24, 2017

Day 242 Of 365 Days of Cock

 I feel like I phoned this one in, but when you have a 365 day project you have days like that... here is a penis done up like John Wayne Gacy's Pogo the Clown character... Calling John Wayne Gacy a sick fuck is an understatement 

Friday, December 22, 2017

Day 240 Of 365 Days of Cock

The other day I sent my brother Kurt my comic of my dad drunkenly pissing on some random car outside of the 50th State Fair and he reminded me that on road trips our dad would pretend to check the radiator of the car but really just piss all over the front of the car... 

Thursday, December 21, 2017

Day 239 Of 365 Days of Cock

"Mel, Kiss my grits!"

I'm not sure what, "kiss my grits" means, but I sure thought it was funny when Flo would say that to Mel... which might be one of my earliest memories of someone speaking truth to power...

Wednesday, December 20, 2017

Day 238 Of 365 Days of Cock

 The apple doesn't fall far from the tree!

When I was younger my dad took me to the 50th State Fair and we had a great time. We went to the Freak Show and there was a guy that laid on a bed of nails, he asked for a volunteer to come up and stand on him. My dad raced up front and volunteered why proclaiming, "I'll kill him!" After my dad stood on the guy and the guy didn't die my dad seemed a bit disappointed... After a few hours of family time bullshit my dad retired to the beer tent and my mom took us home to have dinner. A few hours later we dragged my dad out of the fair and towards the car. While walking to the car my dad told me, "Karl, you are a good boy, I tried to win you a prize, but I didn't so you don't get anything" then my dad did the most bad ass thing any father has ever done... my dad lifted up his leg like a dog pointed his foot at some random car, and pissed out the leg of his Daisy Duke shorts without the aid of a finger to aim his pisser. My dad had the accuracy of Simo Häyhä  & that makes me proud!

 My dad passed away a few years back and I miss him, but luckily for me I have all sorts of fucked up memories of him.

Tuesday, December 19, 2017

Day 237 Of 365 Days of Cock

This one was drawn on Bethany's suggestion...

The Asshole says, "are you on your period!"

I say, "Actually your dad butt fucked me several months back and I haven't had my period since... I am gonna shit out your little brother any time now!"

It goes with out saying but the guy with the come back of, "are you on your period" is just a fucking asshole! If you meet a guy like this do everyone a favor and don't fuck them...

Monday, December 18, 2017

Day 236 Of 365 Days of Cock

"that's the sound of the men working on the chain gang, all day long they're sayin' hoo ahh hoo ahh!" 

It's another Beat Your Meat Monday and what better way to celebrate like pounding your cock to smithereens... 

Sunday, December 17, 2017

Day 235 Of 365 Days of Cock

To quote Morrissey, "Oh, fold fuckers in the world unite and take over!"

The libertines are back and this time around they want you to know that anything goes when it cums to fold fucking!

Saturday, December 16, 2017


I hate to admit to this but I boned out on the Descendents gig, I was feeling some anxiety and figured it would better to stay home and play with my dogs... With that stated here is a painting I recently finished, I am sure you won't care...

Day 234 Of 365 Days of Cock

"Charlie bit off my penis and it really hurt!"

Remember "Charlie bit my finger"? That video was cute as hell, here is my tribute to that video!

Thursday, December 14, 2017


This Saturday this dick is gonna catch the Descendents @ the Brooklyn Bowl... super stoked! I'll see you there! 

Day 232 Of 365 Days of Cock

 For some reason 5 dollar meal boxes seem to be all the rage now a days, well at least according to the TV commercials I have seen... I don't eat at Taco Bell, Popeye's, Kentucky Fried Chicken, or Carl's Jr, but if I did I could get a box full of shit for 5 bucks, which was the inspiration for a  5 dollar box of cock for a meal... this obviously isn't my cock because my dick is too small to poke through the box

Wednesday, December 13, 2017

Day 231 Of 365 Days of Cock

 Recently I was informed that one of my favorite Thai restaurants Komol was closed due to a bug infestation, bummer I love their lunch specials and the wide variety of vegetarian options!

 While I sat back and drank beer over the devastating news I thought about all of the other businesses at Commercial Center that could be affected by the bug infestation, The Green Door (swingers club), Hawks Gym (which is an all male "gym"), the Entourage Vegas Spa and Health Club (bath house), Badlands Saloon (Gay Cowboy bar, I love this place!), Las Vegas Lounge (TG/TS friendly bar*) Spotlight Lounge (every time I have been here I have met super cool people) & all sorts of other shit.

 My religious coworker Phil thinks Commercial Center should be carpet bombed, while I like the fact that everybody has a place to get away from the daily bullshit and be around like minded people....  As I explained it to Phil, "isn't it nice to know that if you have an itch there is someone around to scratch it" He explained to me that this kind of lifestyle is the gateway to murder or some shit & told me about some coworker, you can read for yourself at the link I provided at my Fat Drunk Hairy blog.

 My thoughts then turned to one of one of my friends that used to frequent the Apollo Spa (R.I.P.) @ the Commercial Center, he told me about something called Lights Out Tuesday, for those not in the know Lights Out Tuesday is a weekly event where the lights are turned off & in my friends own words, "as one cock leaves your mouth another one enters & same goes for your asshole" I wondered if it was possible for a cockroach to hop on an unsuspected penis then shoved into a welcoming butt hole, the inspiration for this drawing was born!

 *I  assume my former boss shared this story with me because he knows I am an open minded person... a few years back I was working at my former place of employment and my boss at the time told me he met a hot chick at the Las Vegas Lounge, my interest was peaked because I knew about the T-girls that hung out there, and I knew all about my former boss being a total sexist homophobic prick... he went on to tell me that the woman he met had big tits and that he took her home and fucked her, then he asked me, "do you think it's gay to fuck a hot chick with big tits and a dick?" My opinion on this is if the person identifies as a woman, then you are having sex with a woman. To be honest with you that is thinking way to into it, if you are into to it and the other person is into it then have at it! As for the way the question was posed, if you have to ask then it is gay, but it's not like being gay is a bad thing... blah, blah, blah! So instead of saying, "it's gay!" I told my former boss, "it's not gay!" My former boss informed me, "this is exactly why I told you and no one else, if you tell anyone I will fire your ass!"

Tuesday, December 12, 2017

Monday, December 11, 2017

Day 229 Of 365 Days of Cock

A jerk off, jerking off to a jerk off!

"Nothing makes me hotter than our president making America great again!"

Happy Beat Your Meat Monday! In this latest addition we have a jerk off jerking off to a jerk off! Fuck yeah!

Sunday, December 10, 2017


 In an effort to fight the War on Christmas and to Make America Great Again, Donald Tromp has signed an executive order proclaiming that all lips (real or not real) under the mistletoe must be kissed

Day 228 Of 365 Days of Cock

It seems like everyone my age or slightly older is crazy about Star Wars, I dunno I just don't feel it, it's not my thing... I guess I am not the biggest Sci-Fi fan, I would rather listen to Boba Fett Youth than actually watch a movie with Boba Fett in it...  

Saturday, December 9, 2017

Day 227 Of 365 Days of Cock

"...your thigh bone connected to your dick bone, your dick bone connected to your nut bone, I hear the word of the lord!"

 sure the song is religious, but it's a good song and another inspiration for daily cock art!

Friday, December 8, 2017

Day 226 Of 365 Days of Cock

Things that don't make you cool #666 your dick! Doesn't make you smarter, better, or whatever shit you can think of!

 The old fuck says, "what the fuck is wrong with modern woman? flashing your cock to woman used to be cool and sexy! A smack on the ass used to be a compliment!"

this is partially inspired by the guy from INXS making his stupid butt slap as a compliment comment, all of the sexual assault allegations in the headlines, & another part is the guys I see every night who can not contain themselves at a sight of the woman... blah, blah, blah!

I don't know if this is the answer but quite often I'm around men that seem like they should masturbate before leaving the house...

Thursday, December 7, 2017

Day 225 Of 365 Days of Cock

 This drawing is inspired by the McCoffee commercial where some asshole has a bunch of nice friends and they plan for her a surprise party, but she can't be bothered because she has to have her coffee first, fuck her, she can chew on a dick... I bring this up because just about every morning I have a pig fucker walk up to me and ask, "where's Starbucks?" when I tell them I'll show them where it's at, I usually ask them how their stay is going, and quite often I hear the cliche of, "don't ask, I haven't had my coffee yet!" If this is you, go fuck yourself. I can abuse sleeping pills and alcohol and drag myself out of bed and I don't act like an asshole! So spare me the bullshit about how hard it is to be on vacation... I love drinking coffee, I usually drink half a pot a day of it, I can sympathize. With that said, if you are asked how you are doing & all you have is a cliche for a reply, stuff a dick in your mouth because no one wants to hear the sound of a asshole farting, fuck you!

Wednesday, December 6, 2017

Day 224 Of 365 Days of Cock

 I assume it's because I am ambiguously raced, but quite often people will ask me, "what are you?" When I tell than, "My dad's German and my mom is Sinhalese", people often say, "what the fuck is that word, what the fuck is that?" then I explain to them, "Sinhalese are people from Sri Lanka", then they act like I am dumb, because they don't know what it is and ask me again, "what the fuck is that?"

 I don't really give two fucks and a shit if someone knows what a Sinhalese person is or if they can spot Sri Lanka on a map, but it's weird to be greeted with dismissiveness instead of curiosity , oh well.. you can' win them all and for those you can't win I made this handy dandy map that will help them know where Sri Lanka is...

 If you are from one of the countries on this map and are offended, go fuck yourself because my families country is in the shape of a cum droplet, blah, bah, blah, I need to get drunk!

Monday, December 4, 2017

Day 222 Of 365 Days of Cock

Whether you strap it on or it's attached to your body your new favorite day of the week is beat your meat Mondays! 

 Inspired by Meat Free Mondays, but since I am a vegetarian everyday is Meat Free Mondays, so I'll make it Beat Your Meat Mondays... 

Saturday, December 2, 2017